Monday, June 13, 2011

Scorned by a Gay Girl Who Never Was

How many of you were following the blog 'Gay Girl in Damascus' and have recently learned that its entirity has been nothing but an out-of-hand hoax -- written not by a lesbian Syrian girl but by a very sad, self-declared nerd in Georgia?  I followed, a bit -- thankful not to have invested too much of my emotional depth [considering the outcome]. 
Photographic rendition of the Syrian Flag

Even so, I can't shake this feeling of vulnerability that the sham has created within me.  I write from my heart whenever I post and while its naive and idealistic to assume the same from every one of the countless blogs that exist in cyberspace, I was at the very least confident that those I followed were genuine.  Little did I know!  And instead of just tsk-tsking the author [who successfully duped the world] and moving on, I seem to be struggling to get over this.

We live in a unique day and age when we can form emotional connections and bonds of commradery with persons that we very likely will never meet thanks to the far-reaching accessibility of the internet.  And while we don't ever share face-to-face interactions with said persons, many of us who maintain these e-friendships will admit that it doesn't minimize the quality of such connections.  Or so we think [apparantly]...

What happens, then, when the honesty of a relationship is solely one-sided?  The author of the Gay Girl blog posted quite the lengthy apology-- admitting that his intentions were sincere at the start and that a snowball-effect caused it to get out of hand.  And while this will blow over quite quickly in the fast-paced world of the Media, I sit here stunned and feeling foolish.  I wonder why this is any different than someone who impersonates another in the physical world [whatever the intentions]?  Were this not cyberspace, would this man not be charged with a crime?

Is it any less hurtful because of the medium chosen?  It sure doesn't feel that way to me.


  1. wow never knew about this, that does (for lack of a better turn of phrase) suck. I do believe that people who do those things are seeking and are hoping that someone will notice them, now that this has come out many others will have to think twice before perpetrating the same hoax, You can't apologize and think it makes it all better, others have invested more than time, they invested in getting to know you, thinking about you and your issues and now you tell them it's a lie?? Yes I do think he should get in legal trouble, fraud is fraud. Whatever happened to common courtesy and decency??

  2. I have a hard time believing that this whole thing was meant to be fiction and not a hoax. Normally when people write fiction on a blog, it's disclosed. Having said that, I am glad it happened. It led me into looking into the gay Muslim issue and was quite surprised at how often Muslims are gay and the heart wrenching crap they have to face. Seriously, American gays have it easier! Anyhow, the guy will get what he deserves.

  3. I would certainly think the author of this blog will face criminal charges, especially if it's true that the State Department began looking for this non-existent girl. You don't fraudulently spend tax payer money without penalty [unless of course you're in politics].

  4. I understand how that feels. I have seen false situations on the net for years now. Some get quite detailed and it messes with people's heads and hearts. I think it's part of living such a compassionate life with hopes that there is good in others. In the process, we feel taken advantage of. But perhaps we can see the positive out of it, we become wiser and as Angela said, it opened her own eyes to something that really does demand more awareness.